Is Money leaving you alone? Are you in a bad spot financially? Better start working on that relationship.
So many times when working with clients I will ask them, “where do you see yourself in three years? What vision do you really have?” The answers are wide-ranging in scope, but they mostly have three core things in common:
They all want to make significantly more money.
They all want to travel more
They all want to have achieved a better level of balance in their lives both professionally and emotionally
When one looks at those answers, it is easy to see how two of the three long-term desires are monetary based (and to be honest the third one will be difficult to achieve if the first two aren’t so they really all are cash flow connected).
If money is so important, then why do so many people have such a terrible relationship with it? Why do so many people avoid talking about it, or avoid asking for it, or even avoid expecting it for their hard work?
I’ve heard people say for years “Ya know, Money isn’t everything…” to which I’ve responded, “I agree, but what’s your point? It sure is a lot better when I have some.”
To prove we have a bad relationship with money, let’s compare it to our human relationships.
Take, for example, that friend that really drives you crazy. You know who I’m talking about: They are negative all the time, full of drama, always complaining, sucking the energy out of you every time you are around them. Do you know that person in your life? Of course, you do. How do you approach that person? Whenever you are forced to be around then, you act civilly because you are s a good person, but you push them away as soon as possible, right? You try to minimize the length of time you have to interact with them and find often times find reasons to pawn them off onto other people.
Well, we aren’t talking about your awkward uncle. Chances are, you do the same thing with your friend, Money.
Whenever that friend, Money, comes around, for whatever reason, whether it’s drama, or bills, or drinks, or whatever, you push them away as fast as you can. You never keep them in your life to really develop a relationship! You get rid of them just as quickly as you get them (or sometimes sooner!). You pawn your friend Money off onto other people and then complain that you never spend any time together. Maybe, you need to be a better friend to Money. Perhaps, it’s time you improve your relationship.
Three Ways to Improve Your Relationship with Money:
1. Talk about Money differently
Believe it or not, what you tell yourself actually matters and there is scientific evidence to prove it. According to research from Juslin & Scherer (2005), when you say things with confidence, it has been shown tremendously more persuasive power both for the speaker and for the receiver.
Start by telling yourself something positive about money every day.
Think back at your life history, how many negative things did you hear about money? How many times did you hear your parents, friends, or family members say things like “We don’t have any money,” “Money is tight this month,” or “don’t spend what we don’t have,” and etc. It has planted in your mind a negative association with money. Get rid of that!
Your first task is to change that mindset relationship.
Start by telling yourself something positive about money every day. Say things like:
“I love how having more money allows me to take care of my children”
“I love how having more money allows me to give back to my church”
“I love how having more money allows me to not stress about bills every month.”
Don’t say it in a longing, hopeful fashion but in a confident and accomplished manner.
Own your statement and change how you think and speak about Money.
2. Get more Money friends
According to a Bankrate report, 63% of Americans only have one source of money to make ends meet. It’s time for you to get some more Money friends! Getting passive income couldn’t be easier. That side-hustle of Affiliate Marketing, Freelance Business, Network Marketing, Real Estate, or some Investments is easier than you realized. Check out setting those up from Amandah Blackwell from Huffpost. You can use a resource like MyCorporation.com or MoneySolver.org to get your business set up correctly and easily.
Start your side hustle can create a second flow of income.
Don’t just rely on one flow of income. Create many flows. It stimulates creativity, as well as improves your relationship with Money. Set that target and start your second business now.
3. End those Bad Money Relationships
Some debt will destroy your relationship with Money. This is called your bad debt. The reason I call this bad debt is because not all debt is created equal. Though many financial advisers say to avoid debt at all costs, the most successful and productive people constantly go into debt for their businesses. Debt is a commonly used tool by the wealthy when it is strategically advantageous. So only use debt when it is beneficial to you and eliminate it when it hurts you. End all debt that drains you financially and hurts your cash flow. Sell, eliminate, and eradicate what you have to in order to end those bad Money relationships just like you would a personal relationship and feel that sense of relief.
Don’t allow bad Money relationships in your life. Cut them off. Now.
If a relationship were hurting you, you’d end it. The same should be said about bad debt. End it!
Change the Relationship and Rise Up
Imagine a time when you are in a good relationship with Money and you can talk about it openly with family and friends? When you can pick up the check at a restaurant and not stress about the bill? When you can invest, travel, or even retire?
It can happen but starts with you changing the way you talk about Money, getting more types of Money, and ending those bad relationships with Money as quickly as possible. Start there and watch what happens.
Improve that relationship today!